IFL Wild Card Results

Notorious RVG 107, Lizard Kings 70
Still no title in John E town, as the Lizard Kings whimper meekly off into the night. RVG clinched it on Sunday night with Reggie Bush's 2nd straight outstanding performance, worth 35. Peyton Manning also chipped in with 20, and Kevin Jones scored 14 despite rushing for negative yardage. The bad news there is, Jones is now out for the year with a foot injury. For Lizard Kings, the playoff game started wonderfully with Willie Parker's 29 on Thursday night...hard to imagine that the rest of his team could only muster up 41 points. What a titanic dodo egg. Only his San Diego D was worth double digits out of the rest of his team. RVG will meet 12-1 Hit Squad in the Semis, whereas L-Kings move on to a non-BCS Bowl game.

BC Bombers 107, Mud Dogs 96
Let's be clear. BC Bombers won this game despite their owner Chris T. CT boneheadedly started CT (RB Chester Taylor), who was inactive on Sunday. Then, in another questionable managerial move, started Vick over Hasselbeck at QB...Vick was worth 1, while Hasselbeck was worth 29. This game was not clinched for BCB until Monday night, when Steven Jackson put up a 35-bomb vs. the Bears D. In another stroke of luck for the Bombers, they were playing a far inferior opponent, the most mediocre of the playoff teams, Mud Dogs. The Dogs put up a valiant effort, led by McNair (23) and T.J. Houshmandzadeh (26), but there were far too many black holes in that lineup to compete. Players such as Wali Lundy and Matt Jones (both worth 1) are barely worthy of appearing on an IFL roster, let alone starting in a Playoff game. BCB now has a date with long-time adversary Mike B (read: he's jealous) and the 11-2 Part Time Pimps in the Semis. Mike P and the Mud Dogs, their season ending in disgrace for the 14th straight year, will appear in a locally blacked out non-BCS Bowl game.

Wild Card Wackiness: Wild Card winners RVG and BCB each put up 107 points. In case it ever comes to this (I pray to Jesus every night that this doesn't happen), here are the Playoff game tiebreakers, according to the IFL Constitution (which is about as obsolete as the United States Constitution), Article III, Section D, Parts 1 and 2:

d) Playoff GameTiebreakers:
1) Total NFL value of TDs, FGs, XP, 2 pt conv. scored by starting lineup (inlcuding defensive and return TDs) (all TDs worth 6, FGs worth 3, etc)
2) Most IFL points by highest remaining draft pick in starting lineup

So according to Part 2, each player still has their 1st round pick in action, so that is the tiebreaker:

Hit Squad - Brian Westbrook
RVG - Peyton Manning

Part Time Pimps - LT
BC Bombers - Steven Jackson

Stay tuned to the IFL Blog for a Semifinal Preview, as well as the IFL-BCS first round recap and Week 15 menu of Bowl Stew. Yummyyyyyy.